T.O.P for Harper’s Bazaar (Sept) Magazine!
My life is a joke and the punchline will always be “because of that one boyband.”
"El, no." --everyone ever
WHO ALLOWED ZAYN TO LOOK AT HARRY AND A BABY LIKE THAT? WHAT.
But now I want fic where Zarry are newly-separated exes who still love each other, they just don’t like each other, IT’S COMPLICATED. Anyway, they find out while they’re going through the divorce that their adoption application came through, so they have to halt proceedings for a bit make sure nothing jeopardises them getting the baby they’ve both always wanted, and play house, give the adoption office NO REASON to suspect that the Malik-Styles household is anything but deliriously happy.
And their little boy comes, and he’s lovely. Let’s call him Baby because I suck at names and kids. Zayn doesn’t think he’s ever seen anyone so perfect, he spends hours just checking his fingers and toes, and sketching the way his baby-plump cheeks catch the light, and he doesn’t think he’ll ever get bored.
Harry thinks Baby is magical. Legit magical. He tells Baby so every single time it’s his night to do bath and bedtime. He tells Baby how he’s an actual pixie-child they discovered on accident on their doorstep one day and a magical merbaby they rescued from a sea witch the next, all in long rambling run-on sentences that make Baby giggle and burp and yank at Harry’s ponytail like it’s the best toy he’s ever had.
Zayn watches Harry and Baby sometimes. Watches them while they’re napping in the afternoons or when Harry’s warming formula up on the stove with their son notched on his hip as he narrates every single thing he does like it’s a sophisticated cooking show with a posh accent and everything. And Zayn’s fingers itch every time, for the nearest pencil, a pastel, or a watercolour brush (he’s always loved Harry in watercolours).
His heart hurts too, sometimes so hard he has to press his hand into it to make it stop, and go hide in his bedroom (which is next to Baby’s bedroom which is next to Harry’s at the end of the hallway) until he remembers not to say something stupid like “I’m crazy about you. Still. After all this, I’m still fucking crazy.”
Okay first of all how dare you leave this feelings grenade in my ask box and second of all Harry Styles would totally name their unnamed baby Baby because: 1) “Zayn, Baby Boy Styles-Malik is too long; 2) “Zayn we can’t get too attached to him what if they take him away if we slip up; and 3) it gives Harry an excuse to use the word baby around Zayn. Harry knows that deep down, however inane it may sound, Zayn’s loved that petname the most. And maybe, maybe, on the sixth or seventh time Harry finds himself staring at Zayn while uttering the word out loud instead at the wriggling little bundle in his arms, a part of Zayn will recall why Harry-and-Zayn ever happened, even if neither of them can quite remember how they ever worked out.